No Smoking Here! 6+ months!

Can you believe it?? I'm barely believing it! Over 6 months of not smoking. Over. Six. Months! That's half a year!

I started working out again, and I'm trying to establish a routine that works for my schedule (which is CRAZY).

So far, I've worked out 9 out of the last 11 days. Woohoo!

Okay. For anyone who hasn't kept up with this blog from the beginning: I decided it was time to quit smoking, when I did an obstacle course run, and felt like I was going to die, before even STARTING any obstacles.

It was before even a half mile. Of course, I was climbing a hill, that is meant to be skied (skiied?) down. The kicker? I was BARELY walking up that hill.

My lungs were burning, and it wasn't from the August heat in Missouri. My pulse was off the charts. My eyes felt like they were buldging out of my head. I wanted to cough. Hell, maybe I did cough.

 I just remember, I didn't enjoy myself, during that run. I sign up for ocrs, because I think they are fun.  It wasn't fun. At all. I was embarrassed.

 And then there were the photos. Oh. Dear. God. The photos. My face was a scowl in every single one. I should have been smiling, and having a good time.

Nope.

Because why?

Because I smoked.

Because I smoked a pack of cigarettes a day.
And now?
Have a look:

I want to tell anyone who is struggling to quit, that you can do it! It takes 21 days to form a habit. Use the patch, finds something for your hands to do, for 21 days. You will be as amazed with yourself as I still am with myself. I only used the patch for 8-10 weeks. Now, I'm completely off of nicotine! 

Good luck, fellow quitters! 

❤

Tabbie

days 42 & 43

Holy crap! For a couple of days after stepping down to step 2 of the patch, I was cranky.  And by "cranky" I mean a nasty, angry, b*tch. No joke. I'm glad I wasn't at work for that business. Everyone would have been thinking "Hot damn, Tabbie is a real b*tch!" 

I clipped some coupons on Sunday. I kinda laughed about it, because there are only about 2 or 3 that I'll actually use. I'm giving the rest away. 

I have figured out what I am going to be for Halloween. I'm going to be a punk rock prom queen. Fun!  I really wish u owned a pair of combat boots. That would perfect the costume.

That's all, really. 

day 41

Somewhere, I messed up my days. ha! 

It has been 41 days, since I last smoked. I just put my second step 2 patch on, today.

Last night, I dreamed that I was at my brother's house, and we all went outside, and I smoked a cigarette. I forgot that I quit, until I was putting the cigarette out. I was so pissed at myself. My goodness. 

My dreams aren't crazy, but they are very vivid. I'm thinking I might be getting sick, because I've been absolutely exhausted lately. But, then again, I was never sick when I was smoking, and I'm pretty sure my immune system should be kicking ass, even more now that it isn't being completely poisoned by thousands of chemicals. Right?! Maybe I should research that? Meh. 

Overall, quitting with the nicoderm patch has been easy. Like, too easy.  

To anyone who wants to quit, and has tried everything else, I recommend the Nicoderm CQ patch, for sure. (Walmart even has their own brand, called equate nicotine transdermal system) This has been, by far, the most  successful method for me. 

And I wish you luck, if you choose to become a quitter, as well. 

days 34 & 35

It's less than a week until I step down to step 2 of the nicoderm CQ patches. So, in less than 5 weeks I will be weened from nicotine, completely!

I'm getting a little scared.

Thoughts run through my mind, like "What if I start having cravings again, when I'm not getting as much nicotine,  transdermally?" 

And many others like that. 

As of right now, I am determined to keep this up. I don't want to smoke anymore. I don't want to be nicotine's little bitch, ever again. 

Now, don't take that the wrong way. I'm not saying smokers are nicotine's bitches. I'm saying I was. It controlled everything I did. 

I would eat really fast, when my family and I would go out to dinner, just so I could smoke a cigarette before they were done eating, and before they were ready to leave. 

I would let Meg sleep an extra 10 minutes, so I could get in that morning smoke. 

We wouldn't leave for places on time, because I'd stand outside of the car, smoking a cigarette, just to get my fix.

Is that not the most sickening thing?

 I mean there are worse things in this world to become addicted to. Some people are alcoholics, and struggle with it every single day of their lives, whether they are still indulging, or fighting the good fight.

Some people are addicted to harsher, more frowned upon drugs, like meth, coke, crack, or heroin. 

Some are struggling with prescription medications, and that battle is one I was terrified of. I can see how easy it would be, to become addicted to muscle relaxers. This is the reason I always refused painkillers, anytime I was in the ER. No, Dr. Thank you though, aleve will work just fine. And anytime they did prescribe me painkillers, I would throw the scrip away, right in front of them. Ha! 

But, my addiction? It comes with multiple ways to quit. How lucky am I, to have so many options, to help me succeed? Where many of the options have failed, I am praying this one continues to work. I'm hoping the patch, along with my will and determination, can win this war. 

Btw, I keep having dreams that I am smoking. Sometimes, since I'm a very active sleeper, I want to tie a bell to my ankle, just to make sure I'm not sleep smoking. (I would go outside)

Anyway. That's all for this round. 

XOXO 

33 days!

This quitter is really quitting, everyone! Just in case you were wondering. 

Not smoking has left me with lots of time on my hands. I'm not complaining. I'm just trying to find fun things to do, to make that free time more fun. 

So far, I have:

Perfected the art of "bathroom selfies".

Yes, I totally taught my kid how to take bathroom selfies. Ha!

I have started going to stores, just to earn kicks. Have you ever heard of shopkick? You look crazy, walking through stores, just scanning items, with your phone, but, whatever. It's incredibly addictive! 

Then, there are these other two apps I downloaded, one is called Ibotta, and the other is called checkout51. Both pay you for scanning receipts, after you go shopping. Pretty crazy! I'm no good at couponing, so, these will suffice. 

And, when I'm feeling into it, I have yoga and workout apps, ON. MY. PHONE! (Both free!!)

As a matter of fact, all my apps are free. I'm too cheap to pay for an app. Haha! 

Oh yeah! And two other apps I have are for finding out if the food I buy is organic, nonGMO, and for skin products, to find out the health and  environmental risks! Such fun!

So, now you know what I've been up to. 

(Avoiding housework)

;)

day 31 and 32.

 So, on day 31, I put my nicotine patch back on. I wasn't sleeping well, so, I looked it up. Good ole Google. ;) I found that it was possibly a result of nicotine withdrawal. Yuck! Who knew? So, I have it on, and will be starting step two next week. 

I know, when I started this process, we kept thinking it was such a long process, and how expensive it was, and everything. Now, I know how much was saved by not buying cigarettes, and, we are still coming away on top. The patches  are only "more expensive" because you can't buy a single patch. You purchase your entire week's worth, or two weeks worth, so it sounds more pricey. I think, so far, we have only spent about $100 on the patches. That was the entire step one process. That's only a little more than half of what I would have spent on cigarettes. 

Pretty amazing, huh? 

$160.00/month can mean:

1. Better car. (Trade one in for a car that may cost a little more, in payments, but, will be more reliable. Like, I don't know, trading my Toyota corolla for a Jeep?)

2. Extracurriculars for Megan. 

3. Obstacle course races. (With that much extra money, if all I spent it on, was obstacle course races, I could get in 2-6 races a month! That's 2-6 NEW T-SHIRTS A MONTH! haha.)

4. Family nights AND date nights. (Probably 2 each per month. We are pretty cheap)

Now. Per year? 

If we took that money, and put it in a special bank account, and kept it around for a rainy day, (or a sunny, sunny, tropical vacation), it would build up to around $1,800/ year. That's rounding down to savings of $150/month. 

What could we do, for a family of 3, for $1,800??? 

I'll tell you.

A F-ing LOT!

I mean, we live in Kansas. There isn't much around here that is super expensive. Well, that I know of, anyway.  Again, we are pretty cheap. (Easily amused, I guess?)

Okay. So, things I consider expensive, that may not be too far fetched, now:

Great Wolf Lodge. Maybe a family staycation, in the winter months sometime. I don't know?! I'm still on the fence on this one. $279/night for 2 adults and 1 child, in a regular two bed, room. That's a month and a half of not smoking. 

How about a real vacation, for a family of 3. We'll stay in the US for our first "big" vacation. I really want to get an RV, and take a month off of work, during summer, and drive around the united States. I've always wanted to do this. 

How much is an RV (that runs!)? Nothing spectacular, but not like the one from that Robin Williams movie, either. 

  

This looks promising, yeah? 2 years, and something like this, could be mine! (Ours?)

http://kansascity.craigslist.org/rvs/4697963432.html

I'm leaning toward opening a separate savings account, now. Lol! 

Okay. You all get my point, right? 

I slept all day, of day 32. 

Nice, huh? Super interesting. I don't even remember my dream. =P

*Off to the bank, to open that vacation account*

29 days and 1 Month (30 days)

So, I am slowly not paying as much attention to what's going on differently, since I quit smoking, and started the Nicoderm CQ patches. I clear my throat less than before.

My ability to smell has become, almost annoying. I can smell when my husband is smoking a cigarette outside in our front yard. (when the windows are open.)

I can smell my dog, better than I could before. He really is smelly. blah!

I am breathing easier. I am sure it will get even better, as time goes by. I am looking forward to it! =D

A bit of information. Today (right now) it is Thursday, really early in the morning. I am not gone down to step 2 or step 3 of the patches. I took my patch off, Monday afternoon, around 3pm-ish, and have not put another one on. I have patches, leftover from step one, for just-in-case situations, but, I kept thinking, Gee Wiz guys... ha! I just kept thinking how badly I wanted to rid my body of the nicotine. be gone!

One thing I have noticed, since removing the patch, is that I am now UNABLE to sleep, soundly, during the day. Now, some of you may read this and think, "So what?!" but, I work NIGHTS.

UGH. So, I haven't slept well, Tues, or Wed, and that is not great. I need to sleep. I mean, I have slept, but, I woke up every hour, all day Wednesday, and same with my nap on Tuesday (about a 2-3 hour nap). I am hoping I nod off, after dropping Megan off at school, and not waking up, until it is time to pick her up. (It's the small things, in life, that really matter. You know, like.... uhmmmm... sleep!)

I figured I would include a little bit of information, about where I am according to my quit time app on my phone. I always post the one about cigarettes not smoked, money saved, and life saved, but I never really show any facts about not smoking. Crazy. I  might change things up, and include the name a description of one ingredient from a cigarette, with each post. Who knows??

There are over 4,000 ingredients in a single cigarette. Pretty crazy, huh? And, of those 4,000+ ingredients, 69 are KNOWN CARCINOGENS! Yikes!

Well, That's all for today, I guess.

Until next time, Good Morning, Good Afternoon, and Good Night. =)

PS. Nicotine withdrawal can cause insomnia, uh oh! *Putting patch on, like a good little girl*



28 days later

No no. Not the zombie movie. ;) It's been 28 days since I had a cigarette! Ha! Wow! Almost 1 whole month. Over $150 saved! I am so, incredibly proud of myself. Quite frankly, I am impressed! 

This isn't my first time trying to quit. This is my first time SUCCESSFULLY quitting! And. It. Feels. Gooooooooood. 

 I am so excited! Yesterday, I didn't have my nicotine patch on for most off the day, and I became quite a nasty b-word. Well. Today, I took my patch off around 3pm, and haven't put a new one on yet! Nor, have I gotten cranky or irritated. I'm stomping this addiction! 

Fixing my chemical dependency. 

I was going to give up soda as well. I was told by many quitters to wait, and conquer one evil at a time. 

So, nicotine (and the other 400 chemical poisons included in cigarettes), had to be the first to go. Bye bye! 

I really want to sign up for another OCR, as a reward. *wink wink* 

There's one here in Kansas, called the Timber Challenge. 

They have a new one, to make 4 runs per year. 

The one I want to do next, is in  the dead of winter. The coldest month in Kansas. Hello, January, fire and ice OCR! (side note* it's only a 2k with 20 obstacles in January, but I can run multiple times!!!)

Okay. I got sidetracked, again. I'm always going off on another subject. 

That's all. Until tomorrow!

P.s. my whole body is sore! Owie!

20 days.

20 days have gone by, and I have continued to be a quitter. That sounds like an oxymoron. 

$107.73 saved. 

1826 minutes of my life saved. 

Insane! Right? Well, i had a dream last night that was crazy weird. Very sexual. Probably Mitch's fault? Haha! Just kidding. I really need to do some research on nicotine and the effects it has on dreaming, if any. 

 I guess I'll look that up, when I'm done playing with my hair. ;)

Speaking of me playing with my hair... We are lifting the yellow out, tomorrow.      I'm loving it, but, it's a complete shock, every time I look in the mirror. 

I love Morgan McAnany. (The one who has fixed my awful haircut. Also, she's my Hubby's cousin.)

18 days

It was a close one, today. But, I made it! I went to get my hair done, and it got butchered. Agh! Super short and super uneven. It's okay, though. 

I had one cut in mind, and it was a super short, cute, pixie type style. Like this:

Instead. I am going to be sporting a fauxhawk. 

Like THIS:

Nice, huh? Lol! 

So, I decided it's going to be black and purple, or blonde and pink. 

But, for real... It was a very close call, today. O_o

I even went as far as lighting a cigarette.

I didn't do it though. 

I let it burn, for a few seconds, then put it out. 

Serrrrrrriously close. 

17 days without smoking!

So. I have gone a full 17 days without smoking.

Yay me. I'm pretty sure my loving husband left his full pack of cigarettes home, today, to test me. (Lol!!)

I didn't give in, to the minor pang of temptation.

 Now, it's more of a curiosity thing. If I were to light a cigarette, after not smoking for this long, would I start coughing and hacking, at the first drag? Probably. 

But, I won't be putting that theory to the test. 

Since I quit smoking, I have had this major desire to cut all of my hair off. So, naturally, I was thinking "what? Am I crazy? No. I'm going to leave it long." You've seen my profile picture (or you have seen me in real life!) My hair was pretty long. If you haven't seen it, here:

Well, I got it cut. For those who read this, and aren't a part of my daily Facebook posts, here's the cut, now:

I have ALSO decided, it is not short enough. 

Here is what I'm going to get...

Did this desire to chop my hair come from not smoking? Maybe subconsciously, but, probably not. 

I just wanted to share, because I am a talker (typer?)

Well, would ya looky there, I went completely off topic. 

Here's to 18 days! That's 2 & 1/2 weeks! Whoop whoop! 

15 days!

I've gone a full 15 days, without smoking! 

My taste buds, most definitely are coming back.

So is my sense of smell. 

Nothing really to report, outside of that. 

Here we go for another day! Another week. Etc...

day 13

I already made a post about part of day 13. I made it the rest of the night, without smoking! 

This is going to sound silly, but, writing that blog  about my urges, when they were happening helped me stomp the urge. 

I did have weird dreams last night, but, nothing I can remember. 

Day 11

It's been 11 days. Yes, I posted late 2 nights in a row. ;) Darn night shift. Lol! 

I got a little pissy today, but, I'm guessing it had more to do with lack of sleep, combined with lack of food, combined with not smoking. 

I saw my husband's pack of cigarettes, and really thought about smoking one. I THOUGHT about it. I did NOT do it. Yay me! 

My reward for not smoking... We rented Captain America Winter Soldier. It's not really my reward, but, it's what we are doing tonight. And I like it! ;) 

Have a fabulous Friday. 

10 Days! I won't be swayed!

It's been 10 whole days! I've been doing great with it. BUT, I haven't been around people smoking.

Am I going to find the smell terrible? Am I going to want to light up with my friends?

I'm hoping not, to the second question.

It's hard to judge whether or not I have a "craving" when I am working, because I work 12 hours, through the night, then sleep all day, then, go right back to work. I don't even THINK about smoking, when I am on a "work stretch". That's nice.

I enjoy not worrying about if I will smell like an ashtray at work.

Oooops, I forgot perfume, today! Hope no one smells the smoke on me. (no longer a problem!)

I am sleeping better, as well.

You want to know what I find the most weird? Watching TV or a movie. My daughter and I watched Avatar (the blue aliens, not the cartoon), without me taking a smoke break. I mean, that movie is LOOOOOOONG!! Amazingly enough, I avoided watching it, because it was so long, and I was thinking how many times I was going to have to pause the movie. So, I just avoided it. Weird, right?

My shows on netflix are going by faster, as well. haha!

I had a weird dream, yesterday, but, I don't remember what it was. It wasn't scary, or anything like that, just weird.

Nothing to note, health-wise, other than breathing being easier. I can walk up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing, so, that's great! If I run, or work out, and my breathing speeds up, it's easier for me to get it under control.

Until next time, my friends...

Day 6: No Fix?

Sorry, I have no rhyme for this title. Ha!

No smoking, still!

I did dream that I smoked two cigarettes, and in my dream, I was so pissed at myself.

The relief I felt upon waking up, and finding it was just a dream, was huge. I felt like I betrayed myself, for smoking. See, my dreams are still very vivid, even though they aren't super crazy.

I just put my last patch of week one on, before leaving for work today. It's amazing. I can't believe I've gone so long without giving in to temptation. To say I'm merely proud of myself, would be an understatement.

Little things I've noticed about myself, today: my face is more clear, and smooth. My teeth are whiter than ever. Yay!

Here's to finishing a week without smoking! Whoop!

Day 3, And Still Smoke Free!

I'm really doing it!! It's working! It's happening! No smokes since September 1st, at 1-2pm.  Still only thoughts like, "this is when I should be smoking." Like after I eat, or when I'm driving. No giving in. No backing down.

Mitch bought me a giant box of sunflower seeds, in individual, small bags. It gives me something to do, instead of hand to mouth for smoking, it's hand tossing sunflower seeds into my mouth. Yummy!

Now, on to the fun stuff. In the packet, for Nicoderm CQ, it says your dreams may become vivid, or weird, and to discontinue use, during sleep time, if they get out of control.

Well, it hasn't been HORRIBLE, for me, so, I've kept each patch on, the full 24 hours.

Last night, I must have been having a hilarious dream, because my husband woke me up, asking if I was okay. (I talk in my sleep, pretty regularly, so laughing doesn't surprise me.) I said I was, and asked why. He told me I was laughing. Like cracking up, type laughing.

I went back to sleep, and proceeded to dream that I worked at a hospital (which I do, so not too weird...). Then the nurses and doctors start showing up. There are men and women, in both groups. (I work in labor and delivery, and all of our nurses are women. There are, both forms of doctors)

My husband worked there, as well.

We were planning a bbq. All the people knew me, and Mitch, and were asking about it.

I worked with plastic surgeons. O_O

For anyone who may not get this, plastics is about as far from labor and delivery as you can get, in my position. Lol!

Okay. The dream then moved on. Megan was about 14 or 15. We lived south of here. Location unknown.

She ran a daycare out of our basement, (think Babysitter's club), only the kids were all dressed like frilly dolls. She would do their hair, and do their makeup, and keep them entertained until their parents got there to pick them up.

When the parents arrived, that's when things got weird.

All of the children would line up in the garage, like they were on display, and Megan would "sell" the child back to their parents. Really, she was just getting paid for baby sitting, but it was like a creepy game, that the kids enjoyed so Megan and each parent played along, maybe??

Then I woke up, 30 minutes before my alarm went off.

Here's to day four!!

Day 2 of being a quitter.

So, yesterday, I went the full day, without a cigarette!! I only had a couple of minor "cravings". I don't know if I should consider them cravings, though. It was more like I wanted to go smoke because I was bored.

I went for a short run, last night. A jog, really. With a bit of walking. (I'd like to say, it was because I took my 9 year old with me, that we walked, but that's not all true. Lol)

Last night, I didn't sleep well at all. I kept waking up, every couple of hours, no super crazy dreams to report, which is, kind of, a let down. I love dreaming. The crazier, the better. I usually feel stress free, the morning after a crazy dream.

Today will be my true challenge. I am off work, and the family is at work and school. O_o

Wish me luck!